ive had a bit of a revelation today. i am me. i am a muslim. and im not middle eastern, arabic, asian. i am american. i am jana. i grew up with an entirely different culture than muslims from overseas. i dont have to give up my whole way of life to be like someone else as long as its withinthe laws of islam.
without even really thinking. i was driving actually and wondering why the police were around a bus stop that had apparently been crashed into by a car when the idea came to my head.
jana, you can be who you are and a muslim too. so many people just change totally when they become a muslim and thats fine if they are totally at peace with this. well i was not and still am not. i used to think of changing my name, changing my attire, changing my every thing. i see many reverts (especially women) who do all of these things then the islamic flame burns out and they often go back to their old name, even more skimpy clothing, hitting the night clubs, drinking, eating pork..etc. they changed too much at one time and its not easy for some.
of course im speaking of only a percentage of reverts so please reverts dont get flared up and write me scathing letters. it just made me think of how the ones that change and then go back to their former styles were never really comfortable in the first place.
my ex husband used to say "i want you to act like the women back in egypt"....but im not egyptian. im an american.
and i can be american, i can be jana not noor or salwa, i can wear loose fitting jeans and a trendy tunic shirt with an attractive veil and nike shoes, i can still go and see my family during their holidays or enjoy seeing the twinkling lights during the "season" without compromising my islamic views one bit, ive no desire to wear abayas except upon special occasions, i can eat halal burgers and regular white bread instead of lamb and flat bread. again dont think im being offensive, ive been there and done that. i enjoy different foods occasionally but i didnt grow up eating many of the things i began to eat after marrying my egyptian muslim husband.
please do not think im targeting anyone. please dont think im offending anyone. i love my abaya/niqaab/kufi/salwar kameez wearing revert brothers and sisters! its just not me and i dont think its me against them or vice versa. we have to be comfortable in our skins.
ive struggled forever thinking im just not getting it because i didnt want to change everything about me to be a muslim. that theres something wrong with me.
but as i said..the idea came to me unexpectedly. islam is for all times, all nations, every culture. and islam's intention is not to make everyone change to fit one cultural bill. no. we are to change our hearts and minds to fit Allah's bill. we can still be what we are as long as we conform to islam and to Allah. as long as we have no other god than the One God.
it was a relief for me. to realize i can be jana, the southern/irish-american girl who loves to laugh alot and enjoys knowing people from every religion, culture, race and nationality. who likes to see people merry during winter holidays. who loves southern fried chicken and sweet iced tea.
so let me introduce myself again.........i am jana. i come from a family of christians. i love my history, our traditions, enjoy being with my family during special occasions, love my modest western clothing AND I AM A MUSLIM.
alhamdulillah.
